Black Love Revolution

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You will all agree with me that we have a relationship crisis in our black communities; So many single parents and damaged youths from toxic relationships.

I have been asking myself the why? When? And How? Questions but then I just find a wider analysis of how bad the situation is and how worse it is getting.

Analyzing the situation from a Pan African angle I would say that having no respect for the traditional family structure and marriage institution has led to irresponsible sexual relations resulting in unplanned pregnancies and later single parenting.

This has been brought about by a different breed of the African who doesn’t know his or her responsibility to the society.

Men who haven’t been taught to man up and take care of their breed and women who have not been taught to open their third eye and choose father figures wisely.

Black Family

Most good women who have kept their number one qualification of a good man to be on financial terms, have lost many good men who would wife them, they chose men who just made them baby mamas.

On the other side, men who have also kept their number one qualification for a good woman on beauty and body shape, have lost good women who would be good mothers to their children and be to them that peace of mind that they look for in extramarital affairs. Good women that would turn a house into a home and draw respect to the family.

In traditional Africa, we had a school system based on age sets that taught our people life skills and prepared them for practical life. After initiation into adulthood, the youths were taught how to rightfully pick partners and how to bring fulfillment to the new family. Respect and love for the spouse and in-laws was a necessity.

Bride price was a norm to show appreciation to the bride`s family. All these virtues taught to the father and mother would be passed to the sons and daughters and to their generations to come. Nowadays people stay together and sire children without even seeking blessings from parents.

A traditional African wedding

Before the actual marriage in traditional Africa, the woman was taught how to make not only the husband but the whole family happy.

Cooking meals, cleaning the compound and nurturing children were among the teachings. The man was taught how to provide for the family, show direction and conflict resolution as the head. 

Violence was not encouraged at all, conflicts were solved through consensus between the two and if matters got to a worse state then, the elders would come in.

Extramarital affairs were taboo and would attract punishment to both parties involved. Homosexuality was seen as evil and highly discouraged.

Today’s youths have to learn these things from reality shows and influences from foreign cultures and celebrities which is a recipe for failed homes. This new thing is not our culture and cannot help us.

Every other race does things in their way, we Africans are left with a dilemma of choosing which side is more African-centered that we may fix ourselves.

Colonialism and slavery were more than the physical scars we see, it was mostly psychological and this is the battle we are yet to win. Destruction of families is more of a race problem. It is one of the psychological warfare tools used against blacks worldwide.

Africans ran away from their culture that was family-centred to western cultures that have brought up problems. This is mainly a problem with the Africans in towns and cities.

Dr. Umar Johnson a psychologist and a pan-Africanist, I was listening to one of his powerful interviews where he was talking about the black man in America and the planned economic castration that has contributed to destabilizing this black power base which is the black family.

In the 1960s and 70s after skilled labour that had been a strong ground for black males in America was eliminated to replace it with professionalism, it disrupted the family structure.

The black female was then taught to keep high financial qualifications for the now struggling black male, this made him irrelevant to his mate. It case applies to the continental African in Cities and towns.

Ancient Egyptian Pharaoh Akhenaten and Queen Nefertiti

In parenting, the two parents play a critical role in the overall growth of a child. A mother provides love, warmth and affection to the family while the father provides guidance, instruction and discipline in the family.

The black man provides gratification, fulfilment and protection to the family. In traditional Africa, marriage was a blessing and a source of pride to the individual, parents and society at large.

Leadership positions were given based on one’s ability to manage a family for if you can’t manage a family then you could not be trusted with a greater population.

It is the African in the village who has been able to preserve this tradition fully. This African is also to be applauded for preserving what it is to be called today the African identity; our language, cultures and traditions.

I liken the African in towns and cities who has run away from his/her identity to the African in the diaspora who lost touch with the identity and thus assimilated to other cultures; European and Arabic cultures.

As a race, we need cultural reconstruction in rebuilding a strong race just like it was before. We have drifted away so much on ways we relate with each other that we find it hard to keep the black power base strong. The key is understanding our mates in terms of our culture and history. We should not be clowns of other races.

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